Legal Schmlegal

Welcome to the legal section of AddMayo.com, where we balance satire with just enough legal language to keep the cease & desists at bay.

Just So We're Clear

AddMayo.com is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or sponsored by any actual mayonnaise brands.

We are not Hellmann's. We are not Kraft. We are not that suspiciously tangy artisanal jar your cousin brought to the picnic.

We do not sell mayonnaise.

We do not manufacture mayonnaise.

We do not believe Miracle Whip is mayo.

This entire site is satire.

It contains traces of cholesterol, unrefrigerated irony, and a mild obsession with brand voice.

But For Reals…

Here's the legal stuff our pretend legal team insists we include:

1. Parody Disclaimer

AddMayo.com is a satirical project intended for humorous, commentary, and parody purposes only. It is not intended to compete with, imitate, or confuse consumers into believing it is associated with any registered trademarks, products, or companies.

2. Trademark Acknowledgment

All third-party product names, logos, and brands remain the property of their respective trademark holders. References to these trademarks are for parody or commentary purposes and do not imply any endorsement or affiliation.

3. Ownership & Transfer

All original content on AddMayo.com, including copy, images, absurd product ideas, and this very legal page, is the intellectual property of the site's creator.

Should AddMayo.com be acquired, the mailing list will transfer to the new owner.

User-generated content (UGC), if submitted, remains the intellectual property of the user. Any future use or handling of that content will be determined by the acquiring party and subject to their terms.

Basically: if someone buys this thing, you'll know who's spreading it next.

4. Data Respect

We collect only the info you choose to give us (like your email and your mayo moment). We won't sell it to third parties, unless you count the future new owner, who gets it all in the acquisition. Fair warning.

We're proudly bootstrapped, vibe-coded, and aggressively acquirable. Let's chat. | Legal